On 31st March 2014, my healthy 'low risk' pregnancy ended in the worst way imaginable. Our precious baby boy Rex James Daniels was stillborn. After being admitted to WSH with what appeared to be early labour symptoms, it soon became apparent that it was something more serious, a hidden placental abruption, and we were rushed into theatre for an emergency C-Section. It wasn't until after Rex was delivered that the team of Doctors realised it was too late, we'd already lost him. The silence that followed whilst they tried to resuscitate our precious baby boy will haunt us forever. Very quickly the midwife encouraged us to see and hold our little man. They brought him to us, all wrapped up in a blue blanket and he was more handsome and perfect than I could ever have imagined he would be. They placed him in my arms, and I felt an overwhelming mixture of instant love and intense heartbreak. Nothing in this world can prepare you for holding your beautiful baby but knowing that you can never take them home where they belong. It wasn't long before we were told that little Rex would need to be taken away to the mortuary for a while 'for his own preservation' but that we could have him back later and spend as much time as we needed with him. How much time could ever be enough? We wanted to take him home and keep him safe forever; we didn't want to be living this nightmare. Whilst he was away, we were moved from recovery into the bereavement room, which is currently situated on the Central Delivery Suite of the Hospital. Although comfortable, the room is very dated and basic. There is no en-suite toilet, which means that anytime you need the loo you have to brave the delivery suite and frequently hear the screams of Mum's in labour, really not what you want to hear! A few hours later, they brought our precious boy back. During the following hours, our family and two of my close friends came to see us and were able to cuddle Rex; these are moments I will treasure forever.The next day I knew the time was coming when we would have to say good-bye. The deterioration of a stillborn baby not kept cooled is very quick and the time that a family can spend with them is incredibly limited. We had to leave the hospital with empty arms that day, and just the precious memories and photographs of our time together. Leaving him behind was the very hardest thing either of us has ever had to do, and we have only got through the months since because of the support of our family, friends and amazing daughters. It's in our son's memory that we would like to do all we can to help and support the appeal to raise funds towards the new bereavement suite at WSH. WSH Charity have raised enough money so far to fund the build of the suite, but need additional funds to furnish it and make it as nice and comfortable as possible. The suite will be situated away from the main Delivery Suite and Maternity wards where it is currently located, but can’t be opened until this money has been raised. This is why we want to help. We specifically want to raise enough money to purchase a ‘Cuddle Cot’ which will enable families to keep their babies close to them, and not have them taken away to the mortuary as we did. If we are fortunate enough to raise additional money then this will go towards buying other things to furnish the suite and make it a little haven away from reality, where families can make precious memories that will last a lifetime. We hope more than anything that this suite hardly ever gets used, but the reality is that it will be. Sadly we know from our own experience with Rex what a huge difference this will make to those families in their darkest of days.

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