My first was Airyhall Library in Aberdeen. Apparently I would insist on carrying the books home myself, tucked under my arm, even though most of them banged against my ankles. Then came Saturday mornings at Epping Library, with a stop at the Golden Iris sweet shop on the way home. And Rock Road Library in Cambridge. And Glasgow University Library where the whole city was spread beneath you and the wind nearly blew you right out of your desk on the 8th floor. And Cambridge University Library which smelt equally of scones and desperation. And now Bibliothèque Chaptal and trying to explain to my son that you CANNOT check out the fire extinguisher. When I was little I PLAYED libraries with the date stamp from Dr Dad's desk. 15 years after that my 'career orientation test' came back ... librarian. And so now, when people kept asking about 40 ... insisting I must absolutely have something to "keep", the answer was suddenly very clear. I want a library. Or rather, I want to give other children what I had. Endless, free, reading. Space to dream and space to imagine. Books you never thought you'd like, and did. Books that made your eyes wide and your curls stand on end. Books that took you somewhere else. Books that made time stop and the future race ahead, beckoning.
Constructing a 'forever' library in Africa with 'Room to Read', the charity I already volunteer for, costs £13,000. I'll be honest. I have absolutely no idea how I'm going to raise this sum. But I will do it, in this, my year of 40. And I'm starting here, today. And the second part of this promise? Some time in my 40s I will visit that library. Sit down between the shelves and dive in. With all the other kids. And just get lost again in books.
Here, at so-called 'mid-life', it's the best gift I could give or have. Here goes ....