Story
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Aching Arms is a charity very close to my heart and I would like to share my story to explain why. I hope you can spare just a few minutes of your time.
Clark and I found out we were expecting on November 18 2012, 5 days before my birthday. We were absolutely delighted but it was not meant to be. It was at my 12 week scan we found out our baby had abnormalities and would not survive. We knew that whether we continued with the pregnancy or not, our baby would not live. “I’m sorry; there is no chance of survival.” Those words destroyed me and my heart shattered into a million pieces.
I delivered our daughter on the 30 January, undoubtedly the most traumatic day of my life and one I will never forget. We named her Angelica.
But my story is not one full of sadness; it is filled with joy, love, pride and hope. I am still a proud mum thanks to Angelica and as a result of my experience; I have now become committed to Aching Arms.
I was introduced to Aching Arms through my sister, after she had arranged for one of their teddies to be sent to me. This teddy had a name tag which said “James” and when I looked up the charity online, I found out that the bears are donated to bereaved parents like me in memory of another baby who was taken too soon. I thought that this was an amazing idea because although I had great support in family and friends, I felt that nobody could truly understand how I was feeling. I cannot express the comfort I feel each time I hold my bear, knowing that out there another mum really understands my pain and it is a symbol of reassurance that I am not alone. James sits beside my bed and each morning when I wake up and each night before I go to sleep, I think of my daughter Angelica and James as well as his mum. It brings me great comfort to know that I am part of a community of “invisible” mums. I feel great pride in knowing that somewhere else in the UK, another mum holds a teddy bearing Angelica’s name and also shares this feeling. I know that Angelica will be remembered, when all too quickly, the rest of the world has forgotten her.
Aching Arms was set up in 2010 and run by group of bereaved mothers. Their aim is to raise awareness of the impact of pregnancy and baby loss and bring some comfort to bereaved parents and their families after the loss of a baby. They provide Aching Arms Bears to hospitals for midwives to give to newly bereaved mothers and also reach out to mums who contact them directly. By giving the gift of a teddy bear Aching Arms hope is that a bereaved mother will know she is not alone or forgotten and may find comfort in times of distress.
I have decided to have a birthday party this year on November 23 to raise money and awareness for Aching Arms because I truly believe in their work and have received support and comfort from them and would like to give something back. I have requested from friends and family that they don’t buy me a present, but that they spend money at my party to help me raise much needed funds for this amazing charity.
Any donation, large or small will be very much appreciated. If you would like to know more about Aching Arms, please visit their website www.achingarms.co.uk
Thank You!